What's Your Motivation?

As writers we tend to pay attention to the way the people around us act and react in various circumstances. We are watchers. Observers. And then we record what we see by using our observations in our stories. We are natural researchers, for that reason.

Do you pay attention to your own motivations? Do you know why you react the way you do in the myriad of circumstances we find ourselves in each and every day? I've learned to pay attention to how I'm feeling at certain times, because I know I'm going to use those feelings and motivations in a book some time.

Are you a people pleaser? Are you a peacemaker? I'm a fixer. I tend to try to find solutions to situations that need fixing. I'm also a pleaser. I like to do things for people to make them happy. However, I'm a person who can easily walk away from somebody if they tick me off. I don't like to waste my time and energy on things that are pointless. While I'm not a confrontational person, I'm not afraid to be firm and call someone on bullshit behavior.

Are you a vengeful person? If somebody cancels having coffee with you are you likely to do the same to them next time around just to even the score, and teach them a lesson? Do you want to punish somebody who has hurt you, even if it's in some small, petty way? Are you a prideful person? Unwilling to admit you're wrong or that you've made a mistake, or that you were just being an asshole that day?

I'm not a vengeful person and I don't have patience for one who is. I'm freakishly easygoing so I'm not easily pissed off. However, I walk away from sulking and pouting. The silent treatment. These are all behaviors designed to regain control by manipulating the other party into feeling ostracised and to force them into stepping back into line. It's a horseshit maneuver that doesn't work on me.

But an honest apology and a confession as to why someone is being a jerk will disarm me. I'm a forgiving person, and I respect honesty.

When you're angry, do you barrel around guns blazing? Or is it a dangerous, slow burn? Silent fury? How do you react to one or the other?

I'm not afraid to admit I'm an asshole, because everyone makes mistakes. So if I'm acting like a tool and I know it, I'll be the first to apologize. Everyone acts like a tool sometimes. It's not a crime. It's worse when you can't admit it and you use a bunch of excuses to cover up the fact that you were really just being a tool. Which in turn makes you look like more of a tool. Am I right?

Your characters are going to act like tools too. What is it that triggers that behavior? How are they acting like a tool? Do they react with anger when they are hurt? Or do they turn inward, walk away and lick their wounds?

How do you react when you're attracted to someone? Do you want to spend more time with them or are you more likely to run away because you're shy? What makes you happy?

Every action results in an action of some sort. Pay attention. Why are you reacting in the way that you do? What are you triggers? What are you characters' triggers?