Something I Didn't Realize

Writing is both organic and technical for me. The creation part of the writing is organic. The characters come from some place in my subconscious, as much as I may try to plan out their traits, it doesn't work that way for me. They are very real people to me as I'm creating the story. I'm very close to them. And so consequently, I often don't realize things the others may see as glaringly obvious about them.

I'm realizing something that should've been clear to me a long time ago about Leah. Another plot thread has fallen into place in my mind. As a method of coping with the horror she faces when working a new case, or even in dealing with the memories of older cases, Leah uses sex. She uses sex as a numbing agent. Shades of sexual addiction, which, during this book,is definitely having a negative effect on her life.

It's not that she's promiscuous, but the very fact that she turns to sex as a coping mechanism spells out addiction. Needing the high, the rush, the euphoria, the distraction when things go badly, all point to addiction.

In this book, the addiction effects every part of her life. Now I have to find a way to get her back on track. Save her from the shambles she's making of her life, and still be able to be the heroine she needs to be.

Not an easy task. I've got my work cut out for me.

So I've been reading Sue Silverman's Love Sick: One Woman's Journey Through Sexual Addiction. Wow. What an excellent memoir. Very candid. Very disturbing, but amazing.

On a happy note, I've been able to get on the elliptical three times a week for the past two weeks! And I've been able to get one for 40 minutes! This is an achievement because usually by the time my little guy finally falls asleep, it's too late for me to get on for very long, and sometimes at all.

But my mother has been spotting me while she's here so it's worked out, which means I'm sleeping better and feeling better. This is good. I'll need to rope my fella into staying inside long enough for my work outs. He's a guy on the go. But I'll tie him down if I have to.

Hmmmm. There's a thought.